


What is Your Relation to Him?

by Princeofflies



Series: Dapperstache Stories [16]
Category: Jackespticeyeegos, Markiplier Egos, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Cheating at Cards, Dodging the poilce, Kidnapping, M/M, On the Run, Qustioning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:14:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27391048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Princeofflies/pseuds/Princeofflies
Summary: Peter nodded and grabbed a dapper-looking man's shoulders. The other man grabbed him by the legs and pulled the man into the car. "Detective, I really don't know about this," Peter whispered.The detective hopped out of the car and closed the door behind him, locking the unconscious man in. "Listen do you want to catch this guy?"Peter nodded. "Then we need to question this one," The Detective said pointing at the car.
Relationships: Jameson Jackson/Wilford Warfstache, dapperstache
Series: Dapperstache Stories [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1930654
Comments: 1
Kudos: 20





	What is Your Relation to Him?

Warnings: Guns, Kidnapping, Murder, sexual inuendoes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sir I don't think this is legal," a short red-haired man whispered to his partner.

A taller man growled at him. "Shut it Peter and help me get him in the car," the man whispered.

Peter nodded and grabbed a dapper-looking man's shoulders. The other man grabbed him by the legs and pulled the man into the car. "Detective, I really don't know about this," Peter whispered.

The detective hopped out of the car and closed the door behind him, locking the unconscious man in. "Listen do you want to catch this guy?"

Peter nodded. "Then we need to question this one," the detective said pointing at the car.

Peter nodded and bit his lip. "I just mean well, he looks like a nice guy why couldn't we just bring him into the station."

"They would just laugh like they always do." The Detective muttered. "Listen," he placed a hand on Peter's shoulder, "he knows the criminal I've been chasing for years who knows if this guy is also a criminal." Peter nodded. "It's just going to be a quick interrogation and he can leave." Peter nodded again. "Now get in the car."

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"Wake up!" The detective yelled and banged on the table.

The man that was handcuffed to the table shot up and blinked quickly. The Detective slammed his hands down on the table again. "What do you know Mr," He trailed off and glanced at Peter.

Peter fumbled with a manila folder. "Uh, Jackson sir, Jameson Jackson."

The detective turned back to Jameson. "Mr. Jackson."

Jameson tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. He tugged at his handcuffs and paused. He looked between The Detective and Peter and swallowed. He smiled nervously and nodded at Peter. "Talk damn you!"

Jameson smiled sweetly at him and nodded at Peter again. "What is he doing?" The Detective asked.

Peter sighed. "Sir he's mute."

The Detective looked between Peter and Jameson. He groaned and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Well, that's just great." He groaned.

"Mr. Jackson, can you sign?" Peter asked.

Jameson nodded and tugged at his handcuffs again. "Sir, I know sign, my mother is deaf."

The detective clenched his jaw. "So you want me to uncuff him?"

Peter nodded. "Mr. Jackson, do you wish harm on us?"

Jameson shook his head and smiled softly. Peter smiled back and walked over to Jameson. The Detective narrowed his eyes when Peter uncuffed Jameson, noting the mutes reaction. Jameson rubbed his wrists and smiled at the two men. The Detective shined a light on Jameson's face. Jameson closed his eyes and leaned away from the light. "What do you know about The Colonel?"

Jameson opened his eyes and tilted his head. The Detective growled. "His last known alias was Wilford 'Mother loving' Warfstache."

Jameson nodded and signed something. Peter nodded. "He signed flashy."

The Detective nodded. "We can agree on that one." Jameson tapped his chin as if in deep thought. He signed something else. "Pink."

The Detective groaned. "So he knows him but he won't tell us anything."

Jameson signed quickly to Peter. "He wants to know what we want to know."

The Detective turned around quickly and banged on the table again. Jameson raised an eyebrow and leaned back. "Where is he?" Jameson shrugged. "You don't know?" Jameson shook his head.

The Detective walked away from the table and leaned his head against the wall opposite Jameson. The wall was covered in photos and newspaper clippings tied together with string. He banged his head against the wall and screamed. Peter cringed back and Jameson looked between them, concerned. "Maybe we should ask other questions?" Peter asked.

The Detective turned around and walked back to them. "What is your relationship with him?"

Jameson smiled and closed his eyes, signing at Peter. Peter blinked. "Could you do that again?"

Jameson did the same sign and opened his eyes again. Peter turned to The Detective. "Husband."

The Detective laughed. "What are you saying."

Jameson raised his left hand and wiggled his fingers, a light pink ring sparkled on his ring finger. He smiled and swayed in his seat. The Detective gaped at him. Peter nodded. "It's the 90's the times are changing after all." He whispered.

The Detective continued to stare at Jameson. "You are married to him?"

Jameson nodded and leaned towards The Detective. He clapped his hands and giggled silently. "How did you two meet?"

Jameson signed at him. "They met when Warfstache was running from the cops and he ducked into Jameson's book store."

The Detective sighed and rubbed his temples. "You are married to that murderer?" The Detective whispered.

Jameson nodded and signed at him again. Peter coughed. "Uh well, he said uh," Peter paused and thought for a second, "I thought he was a real cake eater when I met him he kept trying to have some of the giggle water with me." Peter turned to The Detective. "I have no idea what he's saying."

"That's 20's slang. I haven't heard that kind of talk since I was in my teenage years."

Jameson tipped his hat at the Detective. "Are you trapped as well?"

Jameson shrugged. "Sir what are you talking about?" Peter asked.

Jameson signed slowly while staring at The Detective. "He said that he's been married for fifty years."

"Don't you hate it?" The Detective whispered.

Jameson shook his head. Peter gulped. "He doesn't mind it anymore." Peter glanced between the two. "What's going on?"

The Detective lowered his head. "I'll never catch him will I?"

"You did once." Peter translated.

"He escaped and," The Detective paused, "Jackson. He married into that name."

Jameson nodded. "He picked the rest," Peter said. "Can someone please explain what is going on?"

The Detective shook his head. "I can't say."

Jameson smiled at them and reached into his pocket, pulling out a box of cards. He shook them and tilted his head.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

The door flew open and Wilford walked in grinning maniacally. He pointed his gun at the Detective. "Where is he?" He growled.

The Detective pulled out his own gun and pointed it at Wilford. "Your husband?"

Wilford giggled. "Oh, I love hearing that. My husband." Wilford sighed, his eyes became unfocused. He shook his head quickly and growled. "Yes, my husband where is he?"

The Detective shrugged. "Probably cleaning out my new partner."

"What?"

The Detective laughed. "We made the mistake of playing cards with him and I tapped out after five rounds."

Wilford lowered his gun slowly. "You didn't hurt him?"

The Detective shook his head. "If anything he hurt my head. You've found yourself the perfect partner. I'll never trust a man with a moustache again." The Detective put his own gun in his holster and turned away. "You can go free this time but only cause I'm letting you."

"Of course," Wilford said with a giggle.

"He's in here," The Detective said and waved him into another room.

Jameson sat in the room, smiling innocently at Peter. Peter narrowed his eyes. "I don't trust you," he whispered.

Wilford laughed. "And with good reason, I've seen Jamesy almost clean out an entire casino."

Peter turned to look at him and jumped. "Y-your," he stuttered and pointed at Wilford.

Wilford bowed. "At your service, apologize for interrupting but my husband didn't return home and I was very worried."

Jameson smiled softly at Wilford. Wilford walked over to him and kissed him on the cheek. "Are you being mean to them?"

Jameson shook his head. Wilford leaned over to look at his cards but Jameson swatted him away. Wilford giggled and leaned back towards him. "Just trying to help love," he whispered and kissed him on the cheek again.

Jameson smiled sweetly at Peter and put his cards on the table. Peter paled. "How?" he whispered.

Jameson wiggled in the seat and leaned forward. "Please gumdrop leave them alone."

Jameson raised an eyebrow at Wilford. He nodded and stood up. He tipped his hat to Peter and waved at The Detective. Wilford followed him; he paused at the door and turned to The Detective. "Thanks for not hurting him," he whispered.

The detective nodded and furrowed his eyebrows. "You love him?"

Wilford nodded. "He makes me smile." He leaned towards The Detective. "Remember it's all in your head," he said and tapped him on the nose.

Jameson stood in the doorway and tapped his foot. Wilford smiled. "Coming love." He waved at the two self-proclaimed police officers.

Wilford hooked his arm around Jameson and walked into the night. The Detective laughed. "We'll give them a thirty-second head start."

Peter stood up and looked at the cards that were scattered on the table. "How did he do that?" he whispered.

The Detective rolled his eyes. "He's married to a murder I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't cheat in a card game."

Peter shook his head. "But he didn't."

The Detective leaned out the door and looked around. "Damn it, we lost them."

Peter crossed the room and peered out the door. "How did they disappear so fast?"

The Detective shook his head. "I have learned not to question Wilford Warfstache."

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

Wilford pulled Jameson closer and nuzzled his neck. Jameson giggled silently and ran his hand through Wilford's hair. They were sitting on their bed, Jameson straddling Wilfrod's waist, his shirt was hanging off his shoulders and his waistcoat and bowtie were hanging off the bed. Wilford ran his hands down Jameson's chest. "You scared me," he muttered.

Jameson rolled his eyes. "I know it wasn't your fault blue jay." Wilford laughed softly. "You have got to stop cheating at cards though." Jameson playfully pushed Wilford away and glared at him. "Of course I won't play with you anymore you cheat!"

Jameson crossed his arms and huffed. "I wouldn't have it any other way love," Wilford whispered and pulled Jameson flush against his chest.

"Jamesy Jamesy Jamesy," he groaned. "I can't believe he did that to you the one night I would get to see you."

Jameson nodded and wrapped his arms around Wilford's neck. "No, it was Brazile this time." Jameson kissed him quickly and pulled away.

"Oh you rascal," he muttered and pulled the mute in for another kiss. He pulled away and grinned as Jameson gasped for breath. He pressed open-mouthed kisses down his neck and onto his chest. "I wish we could do this every night."

Jameson closed his eyes and leaned back. "No, I don't think we would get sick of each other." Wilford pressed his face onto Jameson's chest. "You're always with me. I can always hear your thoughts." Wilford pulled Jameson closer. "It's like a constant buzzing."

Jameson leaned forward and kissed the top of Wilford's head. "You have some very morbid thoughts about some of your customers."

Jameson smacked him playfully on the shoulder. Wilford sighed and flipped them over. "And some rather naughty thoughts about me."

Jameson flushed and shook his head. "I'm particularly fond of the one with the leather." Jameson looked away quickly. "God, I love you," He whispered, flipping Jameson over so he was laying on the bed underneath him.

Jameson closed his eyes and smiled. "How long have we been married?" Wilford asked, stroking Jameson's cheek. He sucked in a breath. "Fifty years?" Jameson nodded. "Time really got away from me," he whispered.

Jameson opened his eyes and blinked at him slowly. "Do you regret it?" Jameson gave Wilford a lopsided smile. Wilford chuckled. "I guess you didn't really have a choice in the matter."

Jameson traced the buttons on Wilford shirt. Wilford grinned. "Oh gumdrop," he cried and kissed him deeply. Jameson smiled into the kiss and tugged at Wilford's shirt.

Wilford opened his eyes and watched Jameson's eyes becoming unfocused. Wilford pulled away and watched his husband carefully. "I have to leave tomorrow." Jameson nodded. "I would love to lay low with you but that Detective knows where you live."

Jameson stroked Wilford's cheek and smiled softly. Wilford sighed and grabbed the hand that was on his cheek. "I love you too," he whispered and leaned into Jameson's hand.

Wilford laughed. "Really Jamesy?" he asked and untied his bowtie. Jameson shrugged and silently giggled. Wilford unbuttoned his shirt and sighed. "Well I'm glad you like my chest," he muttered.

Jameson leaned up to kiss him. Wilford pulled his shirt off and raised an eyebrow. Jameson sighed and traced the muscles on Wilford's chest. Wilford giggled. "Keep this up and we won't get to sleep."

Jameson raised and eyebrow and closed his eyes. Wilford laughed and nuzzled into Jameson's neck. "Goodnight blue jay," he whispered and closed his eyes. Jameson ran a hand through Wilford's hair and smiled softly.

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The Detective groaned and punched the wall. Peter sighed. "Sir please calm down."

"He got away again!"

Peter nodded. "Can I please leave my girlfriend is waiting for me?" He asked, glancing around.

The Detective nodded and waved him off. "When do you want me back here?"

"Take a break Peter, you have a week off."

Peter gasped. "Really sir?"

The Detective nodded and watched Peter leave. "We don't need any more people in the loop."

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to write more stories with the detective and Wilfords past.


End file.
